


Like her...

by Raisedfrompredition



Category: Supernatural
Genre: And feels, Angst, Break Up, Drunk Dean, Emotional Dean, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Feels, Fluff, Hunters & Hunting, Love, Nostalgic Dean, POV Dean Winchester, Phone Calls & Telephones, Protective Dean Winchester, SO MUCH FLUFF IM SORRY, So much angst, should I continue this?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-09
Updated: 2015-12-11
Packaged: 2018-04-30 20:53:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5179256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raisedfrompredition/pseuds/Raisedfrompredition
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A painful Break Up, some strong feelings and a drunk phonecall.</p><p>I wanted to base this on Ed Sheeran's "Give me Love" I tried :PP</p><p>*This is from Dean's POV*</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It's late and I felt like writing something fluffy and painful. Im sorry:(

I miss her. Godammit I miss her. It was all my fault. The fights, the runaways, everything. The only thing i knew how to do was push her away and they only thing she knew how to do was love me. Yes, you dumbass, she loved me. I still remember when she had said it , hell I even remember what time it was. It was a thursday, around 12:30. She had just baked a pie, God knows I love her cooking. And as always I was teasing her about it. Long story short we ended up kissing, the pie all over our clothes. Then she said it. I had her against the counter, her scent all over me when she had looked at me and said it, her eyes sparkling.

"God, I love you Dean." She had said and smiled. She had smiled at me in a way that showed that it didnt matter if i wouldnt say it back, because her love for me was enough. But I had said it right back. No hesitations. Nothing. I had said it back in a second. And I meant it. God, I meant it. 

What had gone wrong? I just wanted to keep her safe. I just wanted to make sure she's okay, that I dont fail her too. She wouldnt understand. 

"So...You want me to leave?" She had asked that day, the fights were inevitable.  
"No baby. I just wanna keep you safe." I had replied, knowing that she was going to leave one way or another.  
"I am a hunter Dean!" She had screamed. "I can take care of my goddamn self!" But I had stayed silent.  
"Aren't you gonna say anything?!" she had shouted. What could I tell her? She couldnt understand.

The last thing I had heard of her was a soft movement and a loud bang closing the door closed before pain took over my body. I didnt want to push her away. I didnt, I swear.But I knew that she would end up dead. She had to stay away from me. I had to let her go.

"You are so stupid." Sam had sighed.  
"I am strongly against your desicion Dean." Cas had tried changing my mind.  
"You dick." Charlie had rolled her eyes.  
"I shouldn't care but it was a crazily stupid move Dean." Crowley was on their side too.

I couldn't answer. I couldn't find the right answer for any of them.  
It has been 2 months. 2 months since I have heard her voice. 2 months since I have touched her skin. 2 months since I have seen her beautiful smile. 2 months since I have completely lost myself.

Whiskey is now my best friend, bars my new home. A lot of girls are interested in me but I am sick and tired of em. None of them is her. None of them knows as much as her. None of them understands me as her. God, what have I done?

I'm just drunk. It'll pass. But I miss her. But I shouldn't.

"When have we ever followed instructions?" She had giggled one day. 

I can call her. Tell her, beg her. Or at least...hear her voice again. I look at my phone. Her number is still there, waiting. I remember when she had first given me her number. Day one of Dean Winchester slowly falling in love. 

"If you ever need help again, just call." She had winked. And I had made the greatest desicion in my life.  
"Why don't you come hunt with us? I mean, we could use your help." I had smiled. She had smiled. And at that moment I knew she would turn everything upside down. 

I remember the first time I had claimed her as mine. She was very shy about it, despite her confident self. It was after watching a movie. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and without even thinking I had brushed my lips on hers. Long story short It was the best night of my life.  
I miss her.  
Just call her Dean.  
And tell her what?

 

She can't possibly still love me. How could she? I don't blame her. I just don't want her to hurt. But I had done that too.

Fuck it.

I call.

The beeps follow my heart beat and suddenly they stop as my breath stops too.

"Dean." A soft, tired voice says and only then I realise how late it was. Her voice calms my heart, warms my body. But I immediately need more.

"(Y/N)."


	2. The phone call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drunks always say the truth don't they?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yayyy you guys liked the first chapter!!! I'm not gonna lie, it was late and I needed some angsty Dean:( SO HERE'S MORE *evil laughter*

I hear her sigh. This isn't gonna end well. The alcohol is screaming in my brain, ordering me to say something stupid and ruin this all but I can still keep in control.

"Dean are you okay?" She says after some seconds, she sounds worried yet desperate to end the call.

"Define okay." I smile but she can't see it even though I know that she has just imagined it, she knows me too well.

"Are you hurt? Physically." She sighs again, making my heartbeat increase. Please don't hung up.

"No, I am fine. Physically." I reply slowing my breathing so as to hear every word she says, every breath she takes. I need to know if she is okay with this phonecall or not. Of course she's not Dean! You left her! You pushed her away! She hates you! The voices in my head wouldn't stop. She stopped them after asking a question.

"Why did you call Dean?" She asks. Everything inside me tenses. _Because I love you_ I wanna scream at her but she won't believe it, I know it.

"I-I wanted to hear your voice." I finally say, kicking myself mentally. She sighs again. She is tired, I can tell.

"You're drunk." She almost whispers in a broken voice. I can picture her, right there, in the dark, her eyes closed, her head down. She's hurting again, her voice gives it away. How do I always end up hurting her?

"Drunks always say the truth, don't they?" I smirk but my voice is much sadder than that. I know somewhere inside her she smiles too at my statement.

 

 

 

I remember when I had said it, even if I was super drunk. It was a night after an awful hunt, having us all drinking our asses. Sammy had stayed at the bar, giving us space as we returned to the motel, our drunk laughs echoing everywhere.

 _"I want to stop this."_ I had drunkily said as she layed down next to me. She looked at me with wide eyes. She must have thought I wanted to break up with her.

 _"The hunting. I wanna stop hunting."_ I continued and she smiled, telling me to quit bullshiting her.

 _"I mean it babe. I wanna have a house, some children, a beautiful wife."_ I said and kissed her hair. She had laughed.

 _"You are so drunk."_ She had giggled.

_"Drunks always say the truth don't they?"_

 

 

 

"Dean I'm going to have to hung up." She said, snapping me out of my lovely flashback. I tensed even more.

"No. No please. I need to talk to you." I quickly said, ready to beg.

"I don't think there's something left to talk about Dean. You told me everything you wanted 2 months ago." She says, her voice is breaking. I think she will hung up but she doesn't , instead she's waiting for me to reply. Don't fuck this up.

"I didn't. It's just...You wouldn't understand babe. You couldn't..." I say, the alcohol taking away all of the things i wanted to say.

"Dean, we can't have this talk now and you know it." Her voice is deep and broken. She's crying.

"I need you." I say. The line silences for a moment.

" I know. Me too. But I have to hung up." She says and my heart flies at her words. She needs me too. She loves me. Right?

"Baby please don't. I love you." I say completely forgetting that I shouldn't have. I couldn't tell her that I loved her with her thinking I was completely drunk. She would never want to believe it again.

"You can call me when you're sober If you want." She's sobbing now. Im ready to yell at the phone when I hear the dead beeps. My heart falls down and I can hear it cracking. Not for the first time though. I have to make her understand. I have to make her come back.  I love that girl.

I decide to ask Sam to help me track her down in the morning. I leave some money on the counter and drive off, the bunker is some minutes away. I am dizzy and so tired, I just wanna lose myself in her embrace. She always used to take care of me. She would say that everything is okay, that no one could harm me when I was with her and for the first time in my pathetic life it had felt safe. She was my only virtue. Who in his right mind would want to screw that up?

Suddenly I feel selfish. I had let her go to keep her safe and now out of nowhere I wanted her back. Who do you think you are Dean Winchester? No. I have to protect her. She will be unsafe out there. Dean, she'll think you're going crazy.

I park the car and enter thee bunker, a conversation taking over the usual silence.

"Sam?" I shout and suddenly the voices stop. I enter the kitchen. There he is. Yet, he's not alone.

"Sarah?" I ask, my eyes widen. (Y/N)'s sister.

"Dean. We need your help."


	3. She's drunk.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sarah , Sam and Dean decide to find her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM BACK. I have no idea how long it has been since I have uploaded (not too long but long for me). I'm sorry for that but I' m going through some crappy stuff and depression has gotten the best of me. I also have like zero free time so I'm trying my best. I am fully aware that I have two other fics to end and I'm working on it ,I swear, just bear with me:)
> 
> Enough about my crappy schedule. I hope you enjoy! Kudos and Comments always make my day!

Sarah and (Y/N) never had a good relationship. Sarah hated us for taking her away and (Y/N) hated Sarah for never accepting that we were family too. Long story short, they were never in good terms, since they were kids.

Sarah was determined to take revenge for their parents and brother who had been murderded by some vamps. She had been trying for her whole life while (Y/N) had accepted from the start that there was more to hunting than just revenge. She liked the job. She reminded me of myself a lot ,which could perfectly explain the crazy fights and unbelievable chemistry.

Sarah coming to the bunker was something impossible, which could only mean the worst.

"Dean we need your help." She said and they both (Sam and her ) looked at me, as if they were expecting me to know.

"Is she okay?" I asked, didn't even think twice. Sam sighed and sat down. Sarah wouldn't dare to look me in the eye. Why isn't she mad at me?

"No.." She started. "I visited her 3 days ago..She told me to fuck off but in these short moments that I saw her..I could tell she was doing awful." I felt my heart drop.

"What did you see?" I ask, trying to hide the panic in my face.

"First I noticed her eyes. They were dark and tired." Sam stands up and Sarah takes his seat. She doesn't look okay either.

"Her curves are gone. She has lost a lot of weight I'm guessing..." I take a sharp breath. "Her motel room is filled with empty bottles of alcohol. It doesn't matter what. Just drinks." She finishes. Sarah's trying to look tough but I know what pain she's going through. My stomach feels sick, my chest hurts.

"Where is she? I have to find her." I say, my heartbeat increasing more than I thought it could.

"Dean, she's gonna figure out that Sarah told us, she is probably gone already." Sam says, his face showing me that there's literally no hope. No. I have to find her. I grab my keys and jacket.

"Bullshit. Sarah you come with me and tell me everything you know. Sam you can come too if you want. " I say and run off the room, leaving the bunker, Sam and Sarah behind me, both rolling their eyes.

 

 

 

Sarah didn't know much, but it was enough. She was hunting, alone, but according to Sarah she could never finish a hunt without drinking her ass. Other hunters had seen her, she was a complete wreck and after hearing their statements Sarah decided to check it out by herself, finding out it was entirely true. My hands felt glued to the wheel, my feet denying to touch the brakes, I was going to find her. Sam was being very doubtful, which was weird, 3 days ago he was begging me to go find her, to become me again. He wasn't wrong. I was not myself since she had left. After two whole months I'm still drunk every night, still broken, still trying to kill every monster that appears. I was expecting her to be happy. To be free. But she was just like me. What else could I expect? Maybe I should try and call her. She said that I can call her once I'm sober. I am sober...technically.

I pull over after an hour of driving since Sarah and Sam need to eat. We sit at a diner and I walk outside, leaning against "Baby". I look at my phone. This is it. I take a deep breath.

_Calling...(Y/N).._

She waits for a very long time until she finally answers. But she doesn't speak. I can hear her breathe.

"(Y/N)?" I ask, as quietly as I could.

"Listen. If this is about Sarah-" I cut her off.

"It's not. What happened with Sarah?" I lie. She's drunk. Oh, great.

"Nothing." She says after some seconds of complete silence.

"(Y/N) I know it's been a long time but-" She's the one to cut me off now.

"But what? But what Dean? Aren't your night sluts enough? What do you want from me damn it? I gave you what you wanted, I left. Now leave me alone." She yells. She's drunk but I know that she'll say what she wouldn't say when she's sober so I keep talking to her.

"You know I didn't want that." I reply, my voice is very quiet now.

"Did you call me to just bullshit me? I've had enough of that Dean." I clench my teeth.

"(Y/N) You know that I love you." Please say it back,She laughs.

"Is this the "I loved you but I have to let you go" speech? No thanks." She says. I'm not giving up yet.

"I didn't want to hurt you." I say. I hear her take a deep breath.

"Too late for that Dean." She says, she has finally stopped yelling.

"(Y/N) I'm sorry. You know that I-" She cuts me off.

"Don't say it." She says. Her voice has changed entirely. The alcohol is making her confused. She sounds broken and only then I realise that maybe the alcohol is slowly taking off.

"(Y/N).." I start but what could I say? She wouldn't believe me.

"Why did you call?" She asks.

"You said that I could call you once I'm sober." I say, afraid that she might hung up.

"And you're sober?" I can hear the sarcasm in her voice.

"Yes (Y/N). I am. Why are you drunk?" I ask. She laughs.

"Who are you my boyfriend? I can drink whenever I want Dean. It's none of your bussiness." I'm getting angry now.

"Yes it is. I care about you." I say clenching my teeth. "Cute one deanno.Now let's talk about you wanting to keep me safe !" She jokes.

. "Why can't you just hear me out?" I say, tired of this.

"Dean...I know why you called okay? I'm not stupid. Tell Sarah to stop digging. Send Sam lots of hugs. Peace out." She says and hungs up before I can take a breath.

Son of a bitch!

"Dean...I told you man." Sam says behind me patting my shoulder.

"I really don't need sympathy right now Sam." I reply. He looks sad too though.

"I'm not being sympathetic Dean! I'm just saying...Maybe you should let her go. For good." He says and I feel my stomach sicken.

"Why the fuck are you being so cruel Sam?" I snap. I loo at him. He looks so done.

"I'm not being cruel Dean! I'm being legible! You and (Y/N) are a freaking mess! That is why you won't let each other go!" He says. I sigh.\

"So what,you expect me to just let the only girl I have ever loved go?!" I yell. He can't be saying these stuff. He can't be serious.

"I suggest you talk and then say your goodbyes. Then it can be over for good and you can both return to your lifes again." He says in calm voice. That fucker.

"Would you do that?" I calm my voice and step closer to him. "Would you do the same thing for Jess?" I say , knowing I had taken it too far. His expression changes but he doesn't say a thing. He walks into the Impala just as Sarah exits the diner.

"Everything okay?" She asks. I roll my eyes and enter the car, she follows after. When was anything okay? I look at Sam before I turn on the car's engine. He looks lost in space.

"Listen Sam I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said-" He cuts me off, looking at me.

"No. You're right." He says. His expression is sad, filled with guilt aand for once he looks at me like he understands.

"Let's find her."


	4. Redhead Genious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie is calling and she's got some interesting news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAYYY THIS IS A LONG CHAPTER! I hope you like it loves! This story has gotten a lot of fans and It makes me so happy, really your comments make me smile all day like an idiot. SO, THANK YOU. 
> 
> One more chapter to go!!

_“You are such a dork” She giggled as I was kissing her neck, her legs around me, our bodies resting on the couch._

_“You love it.” I had murmured on her skin, taking a deep breath, needing to breathe in her scent. Her skin smelled like strawberry and vanilla and i needed it every second._

_“How can you know?” She teased, it was her favorite game after all. I stopped and looked up, her eyes locked on mine. I smile and her eyes brighten up, a smile forming on her lips too._

_“That's how I know. Your eyes.” I say._

_“What do you mean?” She asks, even though I'm sure she knows what I'm talking about._

_“Whenever I look at you , your eyes brighten up, like you wanna puke butterflies or something.” I laugh as she rolls her eyes._

_“Who do you think you are Winchester?” She giggles, as my lips attack her neck again._

_“I like to consider myself as your boyfriend.” I murmur against her skin._

_“ Is that so?” She smiles. I look up again._

_“Very much so.” I say and kiss her. Her lips move in sync with mine, her scent hypnotising me, her hands burning sweetly on my skin._

_“Jesus babe, what are you doing to me?” I ask when I pull back, trying to catch my breath._

_“Babe? Yeah, I can work with that.” She smiles and attaches her lips to mine again as I lay her down on the couch, my hands ghosting over her perfect breasts. She moans and that's the only thing I need to get me going._

_“Dean..” She sighs when I take off her shirt, then mine._

_“Dean!” She moans when my mouth starts leaving soft kisses on her chest._

_“Dean!” She moans louder when my hand starts travelling below her stomach._

__

“Dean! Dean!” Sam shouts, violently dragging me out of my sweet dream-memory. If i pretend enough, I can still smell her perfume.

“What is it man?!” I complain, my voice tired.

“Time for you to take the wheel sleepy head.” He says and gives me the best bitch face he's got.

“Fine.” I yawn and he stops the car, in a second we have changed seats.  Sarah is sleeping in the back seat, I'll have to wake her in 3 hours.

“Uhm Dean?” Sam awkwadly asks.

“What?!” I ask, confused by his expression.

“ Is that...What I think it is?” He asks, looking at my crotch. Crap.

“Shut up.” I quickly shake it off and he laughs before he turns around,his head resting on the window.

Now I have time to think again. But what should I think of? I don't even know what I'm doing. Dean Winchester would never run after her like that. Dean Winchester would have never fallen in love. What is it about her? What is is that made me change my habits? I haven't had an one night stand in soooo long. Not even after the break-up. Never even thought of cheating. But I had screwed it all up. What a jerk I was, breaking her heart, I has promised I would never do it.

_“You’re going to break my heart aren't you?” She had whispered, our naked bodies as close as they could humanly be._

_“What?” I asked, confused by her statement. It was the day she had told me she loved me._

_“I don’t know Dean...I mean,I opened up, I let you in.I don't think it's gonna end well.” She sighs and nests on my chest._

_“Yes it will.Believe me babe, there’s no place i’d rather be right now.” I smile at her and kiss her._

_“I will never break your heart sweetheart.” I continued._

_“Promise?” She had asked, whispering._

_“Promise.” I had murmured inside her hair._

My hands tighten around the wheel. I'm not having it, I can't take this torture anymore. Fine, I made a mistake but I need her. God, I'm being so selfish. You are the one who made her think you didn't want her Dean! You are the one who made her wreck herself. My inner voice was right. How can I go back and talk to her when I had wrecked her so much? No. I had to save her. But could I? And save her from what?

My phone ringing interrupts my thoughts. I look at the screen, Charlie. Oh crap, I had totally forgotten about her.

“Hey!” I say shyly.

“Cut the crap Dean, I found her.” Charlie says.

“What? How?” How did she even know?

“Do you really think that the first person Sarah contacted was you dumbasses?” I nod, meh she's right.

“Anyways. I called her, she picked up so I tracked her down. She lied on the phone but I know what she's doing. “ she continues.

“Listen, we are-“ I start but she cuts me off.

“I know where you are D. Technolgy, remember?” Ah yeah…

“Meet you in the nearest diner in 10.” She says and hungs up. Alrighty then.

"What happened?" Sarah asks, rubbing her eyes. Sam is still asleep.

"Charlie called." I say, giving her a questioning look.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to mention her." She says and sits back on her seat.

"Since when do you talk to anyone near (Y/N)'s life?" I ask as she sighs.

"I know we had our ups and downs but she's my sister Dean. I should be killing you right now, but you're the only way to find her and fix her." She replies. I know that she will want to take her away from me once we find her but I do not want to argue right now. Sarah and I need to work together so as to find (Y/N). We are the only people who know her inside out, who know her deepest thoughts and secrets.

"Charlie said that she found her." Sarah jumps closer to my seat.

"What? Where is she?!" She asks, raising her voice, hope exhaling from her mouth.

"Calm down. She hasn't told me yet. We will me at the nearest diner." I say. She sighs.

"Fine. Wake me up when we're there." She says as I nod. Lonely driving it is.

**  
  
**

"Hello my servants!" Charlie shouted and jumped in my embrace.

"Nice to see ya Chaarlie." I say as she moves on to Sam.

"Wow, muscles!" She laughs.

"How ya doing Charlie?" Sam smiles.

"I'm okay. I've been working my ass off to find your princess but it's been great. Working on my own is not very easy but it is quiet." She says as me and Sam walk into the diner.

"No need to go inside! I'll be quick." Charlie protests.

"Thanks for the help Charlie, I really appreciate it." Sarah says as we lean against the impala.

"Ah don't worry about it! Besides, I want to find her too! Despite Dean's stupid decisions she was my best friend!"

I sigh, she was so right.

"Back at ya sister." Sarah says giving me a short stare.

"Okay, okay, enough with the Dean shaming, can we get to business?" I say as Sam lets out a small laugh.

"Yeah. Make it quick, Dean has to go back to his mysteriously sexy dream." Sam laughs as the girls look at me with confusion.

"Bite me Sam." I roll my eyes.

"Oh god." Sarah whispers. I clear my throat.

"Can we get back to the point please?" I say, avoiding eye contact with anyone.

"Alright." Charlie giggles and grabs her laptop out of her bag.

"So..When I talked to her she said that she was fine, she tried to fake a happy voice I could tell. She said she was at a motel way out of town, near the beach, taking some time off. She was lying ofcourse. I tracked her phone and right here it says that she's in Minessota."

"That's like 2 hours from here." I say.

"What is she doing there?" Sam asks.

"I figured that she's working a  case. I researched the place and found out that there were some weird ass murders. My guess, a werewolf." She says as she turns the laptop towards me and Sam showing us the article. Yep, totally a werewolf.

"When did you two talk?" Sarah asks.

"Yesterday. Which means that she's still there. I also tracked her credit card so I know where she's staying." She smiles.

"You are a gift Charlie." I say and pull her into a tight hug.

"Let's get to work. I'll be behind you." She winks and enters her car as we do the same. Me behind the wheel, Sam next to me and  Sarah in the back seat taking information from Charlie through the phone. Let's do this.

**  
  
**

The road was empty so driving there was a piece of cake and quicker that it should have been. An hour later we were checking in a motel near hers, not wanting to reveal ourselves. We wanted to catch her off guard and apparently that was my job.

"Tomorrow morning you go break into the room after she's gone."Charlie said before she and Sarah entered their room.

"What?!" I ask.

"No whats Dean. We have to catch her off guard. If she finds you inside the room she won't have a choice but to talk." Sarah protests. I sigh and enter my room.

"Are you going to sleep?" Sam asked me as he took off he shoes and coat.

"Nah. I'll wake you when it's time." I say, knowing that we had at least 3 hours of resting.  I didn't need to sleep anyways.

**  
  
**

The hours pass quickly as I am sitting down on the table drinking some whiskey. I promise not to get drunk and I don't. I see the sun come up and brighten the whole room, as Sam's rubs his eyes open.

"Top of the mornin'!" I say and enter the bathroom, i need to throw some water on my face.

My face is tired, my eyes red but my body is full of energy, determined to win, I'm a hunter after all.

"Dean! She's on the move." Sam shouts and I rush off the bathroom, peeking outside the window. It's true. After two whole months I see her. She's just like Sarah had said, even though she coudn't be prettier. Her hair are messy but shiny and her small waist swings right and left as I watch her walk to her car. She's wearing fed clothes which means only one thing, she's going to question some witnesses. My phone starts ringing which I ignore, drooling at the sight of her.

"Dean! It's charlie."

I take the phone, trying to listen to her but my rapid hearbeat is the only thing I can hear.

"Dean. She's gone, I will need you to go break into the room." Silence.

"Dean? Ya hear me?" I snap out of it as she drives off.

"Yeah, Yeah I do..I'm on it." I say and hung up, Sam looking at me like I'm about to pass out. Am I?

"Dude you okay?" He asks and I give him a sassy eye roll as I take my jacket and car keys. Don't forget my breaking in tools!

I walk to the room, I know Sam's got my back and I look around, checking for people. As I exprected theres's literally no on near so I break in the room.

It smells like Vodka (her favourite drink), mixed with some mentions of vanilla. Her bag is messy as hell, her clothes all over the bed. She always used to organise the hunts on the wall but now I can only see some quickly cut acticles thrown on the table.

There's nothing here to see but I know that I should wait until she arrives. I put the clothes inside her back and sit on the bed. Okay fine, I lay on the bed. Her scent is all over it, hypnotising me as always. I can almost pretend that it's us working on a hunt and she's out buying us some burgers. Almost.

My phone rings and I jump.

"Did you fine anything?" Sarah asks.

"Ah-Ehm...No..." I say trying to return to real life.

"It's messy but no clues." I continue. Sarah sighs.

"Just wait until she comes back okay? And PLEASE don't screw it up." She says and hungs up.

I lay back down, a sigh escaping my lips as I hear the door unlock. Oh, crap. Is she back? I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready for this. The door flies open and there she is, talking on the phone. The room is dark, she hasn't seen me yet.

"Couldn't you just tell me?! I could be taking care of something else now!" She shouts and drops the phone down before she turnd the lights on. I stand infont of her bed like a thief caught. Once her eyes drops on me , she jumps and pulls her gun out but in a second realises it's just me.

"Goddammit Dean! You scared the crap out of me!" She shouts and sighs.

"I-I'm sorry." I say, I don't really know what to say.

"I should have known." She whispers to herself.

"Listen, this is REALLY not a good time." She rubs her eyes and takes off her coat.

"(Y/N) we have to talk." I say and follow her as she enters the bathroom.

"Talk about what?!" She says and turns on me.

"Us? You? What's going with you?" I reply and she lets out a sarcastic laugh.

"I've told you before Dean and I meant it, I don't give a shit about your emotional speech." She says and starts taking off her make-up. I look at her face, I've missed her so much, but I have to keep this converstation going, I have to make her understand.

"That's not true." I say, lowering my voice. She smiles again, this times looking at the mirror.

"What do you know about the truth anyways? All you can say is lies." She states. I feel my heart hurt. Never had I ever lied to her.

"You really think that what we had was built on lies?!" I ask. She doesn't answer. She walks out of the bathroom and opens her bag.

"Just answer me!" I scream a little. Maybe if we fight, she'll feel better. She sighs and looks down.

"Yes I do. I just don't believe you ever meant anything." She says and takes off her skirt putting on a pair of tight jeans. I can't help but want her desperately.

"Why?!

"Is that even a question?! You broke up with me Dean! What more do you need?" She screams back and puts on a top tank. Her body is perfect.

"You know I was just trying to make you happy!" I say walking closer. Her attention is now fully on me as she steps a little bit closer too.

"Oh Yes of course I'm happy! Can't you see? I'm living the life!" She yells and steps away, grabbing a bottle of Vodka and as soon as she attaches it on her mouth, she calms down and sits on the bed.

"Why are you even here?" She asks after she drinks as much as she needs.

"Because I realised that what I did was the worst mistake of my life." I sigh and stand in front of her. She laughs.

"Come on Dean. Say the truth. You were just bait because Sarah wants to take me home." She laughs and stands.

"No. It's not like that." I state.

"So you're telling me that If I go and knock some rooms near Sarah and Charlie will not open?" She smirks.

"They helped but I wanted to come. I miss you like crazy." I say, my voice broken.

"Listen. You don't want me , it's okay. But just let me be." She sighs.

"Are you even listening to me?! I love you! Nothing has changed!" I raise my voice .

"Yeah, I saw how much you loved me 2 months ago!" She yells back.

"Goddammit." I say and push her on the wall, my lips on hers. She immeadiately responds, her hands messing up my hair as mine are digging on her waist. My lips are hungry for hers and my tongue begs for dominance which she happily approves. I'm out of breath but her skin on mine after all this time is causing my body to burn, some euphoria building inside of me.

She pulls back, probably to take a breath and my eyes search for hers. Boom. Lust. We both want this.

"I've missed you so much." She moans when my lips find her neck.

"Me too babe." I reply as my hands start unbuttoning her jeans.

"I thought I would never see you again." She says when I look at her. My thumb brushes her swollen lip.

"I'm sorry." I whisper and attach my lips with hers again. This kiss is more soft but when my hands pull down her panties, her lips become more desperate, more passionate.

"Dean." She moans when my fingers brush her wet folds.

"You really want me." I say when I feel how wet she is.

"Never wanted another." She smiles and takes off my shirt. Her eyes look at my body with devotion and in a second she's kissing my warm torso and I moan arching my head back, her lips are enough to make me see stars.

“Come here” I say and push her on the bed, me on top of her. I start kissing her, feeling my erection growing as I feel my body on hers. She takes her shirt of , revealing her perfect chest and I don't waste any time as I take off her bra, attaching my mouth on her right nipple.

“Fuck!” She whispers between moans, her eyes closed, her fingers digging on my back. I always knew she loved me teasing her.  I leave her breasts with a loud pop and move down until she can feel my breath on her inner thighs.She has already closed her eyes when I insert two fingers on her and my mouth hugs her clit.

“Dammit Dean!” She shouts and I keep going , my groans echoing in the room. Suddenly I decide to change style and my thumb starts drawing circlea on her cli while my tongue fucks her sex, knowing that it always makes her cum.

“You like that baby?” I smirk as she moans louder than I had ever heard.

“Yeah you do. Are you close?” I ask as she licks her lips and opens her eyes.

“Dean. Im.So.Close” She moans and I replace my tongue witg my fingers doing the same thing as my mouth leaves wet kisses on her thighs.

“Dean!” She screams some seconds later as her orgasm bursts through her, my name echoing in the room.

“That was so hot.” I say and she takes advantage flipping us, straddling me. She smirks and pulls down my jeans, followed by my boxers. She smiles wide before she starts stroking her fingers up and down on my cock, making me groan.

“I’ve missed your moans” She bites her lips and kisses my tip.

“(Y/N) fuck.” I say, as my eyes lock with hers and god, I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

Her expression changes, want takes over and suddenly her mouth and tongue are working on my erection and I close my eyes, I can already feel my orgasm developing.

“Stop.” I groan and she looks at me with a questionable look.

“I won't last long, I need you” I say and she smiles as she takes a condom out of her bag next to us.

I lose my desire to ask is she had been using these condoms when she pulls the condom down my cock and places it right in front of her entrance.

“(Y/N).” I stop her.

“What?” She says, her voice is so sweet.

“You’re sure about this right?” I ask, remembering that I had never asked for her consent.

“Are you kidding?” She laughs. “Do your job and make me cum Winchester.” She leans in and whispers inside my ear as she pushes down on me. We both moan at the feeling and my mouth searches for hers but she's already there giving me a loving kiss. I remember how much I love her, how much I had missed her moans, her little whimpers, her skin on mine.

“Oh Dean.” She moans and leans her head on my shoulders as my mouth attacks her neck.

“Let me find that spot baby.” I whisper inside her ear and flip us around, so I can thrust in her. I quicken the pace and our moans become more and louder as we both hit that sweet spot.

My thrusts are becoming sloppy and she's shaking underneath me, her eyes closed her, her lips parted.

“Babe, I'm close.” I state and she smiles at me, her eyes still closed.

“Me too baby.” She says and opens her eyes, her hands cupping my face, her eyes analyzing every inch of it.

Trying not to get distracted at how much love her eyes are giving me, I move my hand down her sex and circle her clit and she arches her back as a second orgasm hits her.

She screams my name and I scream hers as I cum soon after, my mouth attached on hers.

I can’t hear nothing but heavy breathing when I pull out of her, throw away thee used condom and lay next to her. For a moment I'm scared. I'm scared that she will leave, that she will say it meant nothing, that she won’t want me back but she doesn’t. She nests on my chest leaving little kisses on my chest.

“I love you.” She says and sighs.

“These months were like torture to me.” She continues.

“Me too baby.” I whisper.

“I stopped being myself, ya know? And now you're here for an hour and I can feel alive again.” She says and looks at me. I cup her beautiful face.

“It's been the same for me too, I need you to believe that. I never wanted to push you away.” She nods.

“I do. That night, when you called...You were lucky I was sober. Hearing you say that you missed me, that you loved me, it hurt so much.  And for the first time in 2 months I thought that maybe you were hurting too...”

“I did. I couldn't live. I never understood why I did what I did, I just always felt like I was destroying you.” She now cups my face.

“You could never destroy me, you taught me how to live.” She says and our mouths meet in a soft but wet kiss in which we said it all without talking.

“(Y/N) , Sarah will want to take you away you know..” I say when we both pull away.

“And I'll tell her to blow me. I have a home to return to.” She smiles at me and my world just lightens up.

“I will have to thank her for dragging you here though.” She kisses my nose.

“Babe, I dragged them all here. They were so done of my shit. But I guess you should thank Charlie.” I smile at her and we giggle, something we always used to do after sex,I never understood why.

“God, I love you Dean.

“I love you too sweetheart.”

 


	5. Family.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Family doesn't end in blood. But it doesn't start there either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SQUEEEE here's the last chapter. It's small because i just wanted to summarise the ending. HERE YOU GO CHILDREN I HOPE YOU ENJOY. I LOVE THIS STORY SO MUCH *SOBS GROSSLY* PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK.

She kissed my cheek as her fingertips brushed my neck. She leaned in and whispered in my ear.

"Dinner's ready." She said and had dissapeared in a second. I had left the library and entered the kitchen in a minute. Her cooking was heaven. Or maybe her taking care of me was heaven. It had been 2 days since she had gotten home and she had been taking care of me every second. Everything was back to normal, even though it was very hard to believe that she was there, with me.Kissing me, loving me. I never thought she would come back. That she still loved me. 

Everyone was sitting around the table. Even Sarah. Yes, Sarah too. After me and Y/N had gotten back together, they had had a very private talk. I still didn't know what they had talked about. But I didn't care. If it meant that we could be a family it was fine with me.

"So, what are you poisoning us with this time babe?" I teased as she smiled.

"Burgers. But if you don't want to be poisoned that's okay with me."

"Hell no." I said as I pulled her into a tight hug.

"Thank you." I kissed her nose and sat down.

"Imma throw up." Charlie stated as the table giggled. 

"I don't understand why she would want to vomit after seeing-" Cas started but Sam knew what the question was. He also knew that there was no answer that an angel would want to accept.

"Don't sweat it Cas. Inside joke." He quickly shook it off and we all concetrated on our beautiful burger. Damn that woman knew how to cook.

"Damn , I know how to cook." She said after taking the first bite.

"Can't argue with that." It was Sarah that spoke this time. I looked around me. It felt...grossly cute. Me and Y/N will surely laugh about it on bed later. But not now. Now we appreaciate and smile. I would never tell them but I loved having them near. It felt goddamn safe. Not lonely. Finally not lonely. 

 

 

"Wasn't it grossly cute how we were all there? Ya know eating, chatting, loving each other." She laughed while we were watching TV in my room, her head on my chest.

"It was. But it was good." I reply brushing my fingers through her hair.

"Yeah it was." She breathes.

"Y/N.." I whisper and she looks up at me.

"What?" She asks. Her eyes are so beautiful. She is so beautiful.

"I love you." I say and she smiles. 

"I love you too Dean." She says back. And it still feels like the first time. Every time is does. Don't ask why. Maybe the way she said it.

Nobody could say it like her.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading cutiepie


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